Author Archives: shoppingsmycardio

how bloggers make money, and why pinterest is evil

pinterest graphic 2 how bloggers make money, and why pinterest is evil

I know that, for a lot of you, the whole world of “how bloggers make money” is this big, bouncing question mark you’re dying to know more about. In the wake of some news I received yesterday (more on that pile of Pinterest douchebaggery in a moment…), I’m going to spill the beans.

The sad truth is, it’s really not all that exciting. Sure, there are bloggers who make grillions of dollars from ad campaigns and get free Gucci handbags from brand partnerships. There are about 20 of them. For the rest of us? We sell the occasional ad, but these days, most brands are “moving beyond” direct advertising (translation: they’ve figured out we all just tune those sidebar ads out). They’d rather buy a sponsored post…which, for those of us who are picky about our content and aren’t willing to lie to our readers, is like trying to catch a unicorn in a net made of grasshopper legs. (No, I’m not going to run a story about how much I love your cheap polyester miniskirts in exchange for a $50 store credit. Tempting, but no.)

So, if ads are passé and sponsored posts are few and far between, how’s a girl supposed to make a living? Read on

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postcard from nyfw: fashion vs. style

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Am I the only person wondering what the fug is happening at the J.Crew NYFW presentation today? Purple culottes, yellow fur and a suit/jumpsuit/snuggie aberration that defies all rational thought. No. Just no.

Fashion vs. style, friends. I say it all the time, but if this doesn’t bring it home, I can’t imagine what will. I’m all about fashion as art – the design, the eccentricity, the sheer creative genius of it all. But loving a portrait by Picasso doesn’t mean I need to have my ear surgically relocated to my lower cheek.

The next time a designer or a model or a magazine or a blogger tells you something should be in your closet, just take a moment. Think about whether you love the art of that “something”, or whether you love how it would actually make you feel in the real world. Think about what you wear that actually makes you look and feel your absolute best, that makes you feel the most you. Does that “something” fit the bill?

I’m not saying we shouldn’t ever try new things. I swore I’d never venture into skinny jeans, but here we are three years later and I have a closet full of them. I’ve found cuts I love, and ways to wear them that make me feel sophisticated and stylish. Pencil skirts, on the other hand? I have a closet full of those too…but no matter how many magazine editorials tell me they’re sexy, I never feel anything but chubby and self-conscious when I wear them. So, I finally started buying A-line skirts, and it was a revelation.

There’s a reason we all love that French girl style, and more often than not, it’s because they know better than to succumb to every fad that comes their way. Find your style, be true to it, and if a trend happens to pique your interest, dip your toe in. But also, feel absolutely free to walk on by.



350 postcard from nyfw: fashion vs. style
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the best love advice i never got

best tenth anniversary gift e1423675844247 the best love advice i never got

(Warning: the following is not gender-neutral. Not because I’m a big insensitive jerk, but because writing that way is surprisingly hard. Please read with whatever pronouns you love best.)

It’s nearly Valentine’s Day, friends! I know, I know. Every year, I preach about how we should use this “holiday” (such as it is) to celebrate much more than our romantic relationships, so I’ll keep this year’s tirade brief. But. Remember in grade school, when everyone in your class got a Valentine? Even the fat girl everyone made fun of got a card and some conversation hearts. (That was me, by the way – not that I’m bitter.) I try sometimes to remember at what point in our childhoods Valentine’s Day stopped being about everyone, and started being about The One. It’s a travesty, if you ask me. I miss conversation hearts.

As God and Hallmark intended, this week I’ve been thinking a lot about love. Which, in turn, means thinking about my darling Hubs. Not long ago, we had a pretty big anniversary – the kind that makes you sit back and think about all you’ve been through together. And phew…have we been through some shit. Sure, I might occasionally want to strangle him with the dirty socks he leaves on the floor, but when I think about what we’ve survived together during the last decade-plus? We are most definitely MFEO.

And yet. It took me forever to find him. Or at least it felt like forever. Single Me thought I was going to die waiting. Single Me chased bad idea after bad idea, hoping I could browbeat Not It into being The One. Single Me sat home, listening to Sarah McLachlan, watching marathons of Meg Ryan movies and convincing myself I’d never find love. Single Me was the original Bridget Jones. (With a mental picture like that, I know it’s hard to imagine why Single Me wasn’t more successful on the dating market.)

And so, without resorting to black hearts or Anna Howard Shaw, I thought I’d share a few things I wish I could have told Single Me while she was sitting on the floor of her apartment getting down and dirty with a pint of Ben & Jerry’s. Not that she would have listened.

Single is not a disease to be cured. It’s a chapter in your book. And whether it lasts 5 days or 50 years, there’s no pause button to hit while you’re waiting for The One. So, get to work enjoying the unattached life – it’s awesome! Go on a week-long meditation retreat, make new friends, sit in a bookstore for hours, take a class, make out with a stranger, move to Spain for a month…all things you’ll probably never do once you’re paired off. Youth is wasted on the young, and singledom is wasted on people who are too depressed about not being coupled to actually enjoy being single.

Likewise, despite what every romantic comedy ever made would have you believe, being coupled isn’t the end of the story either. It’s just another chapter. Hopefully a long, epic chapter filled with Great Love and unforgettable adventures, but still. I know, you’re looking at paired-off people and assuming their lives are settled and everything is perfect. Trust me: they don’t sprinkle magic dust on you up at the altar. Those coupled people are working just as hard as you at finding their way.

Speaking of working hard, when you’re out there auditioning possible mates (and remember, the audition process goes both ways, friends), ask yourself this: who would I want in my corner? If the going was really, really rough – and at some point on your long road, it will be – would this person have my back? Would they hold my hand during the ugly parts? If they came in a room and saw me curled up in a ball of frustration and fear, would they know whether to pick me up and dust me off or plop down next to me and hand me another brownie? Trust me: that’s the person you want.

Of course, that all makes sense in principle. But in practice, when you’re out there cruising Tinder (purely for research purposes, of course), how on earth can you tell whether the person whose children you’re mentally preparing to have is a person worth giving your life to?

Well, for starters, it won’t look like it does in the movies. (Spoiler alert!) In real life, the one you have to chase is almost never The One. Nope, you want the guy who’s doing everything he can think of to get your attention. The guy who calls when he says he will and shows up on time. Because I promise you this: after a few months, “dependable and smitten” looks a lot sexier than “exciting and unpredictable”.

Marry the guy who wishes he could afford to buy you diamonds. Whether or not he ever gets rich, generosity is harder to find than money.

Maybe most important of all, marry the guy who tries. The one who brings over soup when you’re sick, and makes sure you never run out of chocolate. The one who buys you a tin of Altoids for your anniversary, because he bothered to look up what gift you’re supposed to get for #10, and fancy gifts made of tin are hard to come by. (Don’t worry…I got the diamonds too.)

And once you find the person who does all that? For god’s sake, hold on tight.

Remember that just as real love doesn’t look like the movies, real marriage doesn’t look like a sitcom. So, leave your carping fishwife routine at the door and keep the nagging nice – he’s your partner, not your royal subject.

Take a deep breath before you start screaming – the things that make your head most likely to spin off into another dimension are almost never the Really Big Things, so just be sure the punishment fits the crime.

And every so often, buy the matching undies.

Well. That’s just about everything I know on the subject. What about you? What’s the best advice you’d give your single self?

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Lest you think I’ve abandoned all of my sartorial sensibilities, I thought I’d share a little OOTD action for you today, featuring some of my closet’s current favorite things.

Fashion-y things I have learned this week: deep green & cognac get along awfully well…and for that matter, those chestnut Tieks get along with dang near everything. Also, those jeans are fast becoming my new favorites – they’re from the Gap, if you can believe it, which means you can almost always score them for under $50. The wash is exactly what I’ve been in the mood for after so many seasons of dark denim, and they somehow miraculously don’t stretch out in the back after 10 minutes, unlike every other pair of Gap jeans I’ve ever tried.

Details on the rest of it right over here, or below. (And no, that yummy sweater was not 40% off back when I bought it. Blerg.)

350 postcard


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the best we can

frustrated dog e1422912552213 the best we can

| Isn’t that face is the most perfect picture of frustration you’ve ever seen? Hilarious. But of course, we’ve all been there. |

I don’t know if you’ve been feeling it where you are, but the new year has felt heavy to me this time around. Like one of those hulking winter coats from a thrift store that smells kind of funny and never fits you quite right. There’s sorrow and loss around every corner, it seems, and I’m starting to wonder if my heart can survive it. Read on

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a very very merry

happy holidays a very very merry

via Instagram

This morning, I’m getting ready for a Christmas cookie-decorating date with two of my favorite little munchkins. Being a person who prefers “Favorite Aunt” status to “Mom” status, I can tell you there are few things I enjoy more than borrowing my friends’ children for a few hours, loading them up with sugar and sparkly shoes, then sending them home to crash and burn on my friends’ time. Read on

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even more gift guide goodness

Friends, I hope you’ve loved each and every gift guide we concocted this year. I may be biased, but I know I’ve gotten just about all of my shopping done after going through them all.

But just in case you’re still holding out for one great pick for someone on your list (or for yourself), don’t fret – I’ve been pinning up a storm this holiday season, and my Get Gifting board on Pinterest is jam-packed with ideas. (And then there’s the matter of my Dear Santa board, which is piled high with everything I’m hoping to find under my own tree. Because I’m sure Santa’s social-media-savvy.)

Just in case you can’t be bothered to click through, that handy-dandy little widget will keep updating with my latest finds…so check back as often as Santa will let you.

Follow Shopping’s My Cardio’s board Get Gifting on Pinterest.

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